Be yourself; Everyone else is already taken.
— Oscar Wilde.
It’s 1994. I see a Korean-American women named Margaret Cho on the television set and I am immediately drawn in. She doesn’t look like me but she also doesn’t look like anyone else on TV (ok – maybe Connie Chung but that’s news and what I am watching isn’t the news). Margaret Cho is funny and an actress – WOW. Aren’t Indians and Asians only doctors, lawyers, and engineers? Or cab drivers? I am 11 years old and I don’t laugh at all the jokes on All-American Girl, but sometimes I do get the jokes. My brain, even at the age, could tell that seeing someone on TV that didn’t look like everyone else, even if she didn’t look like me, was meaningful and necessary.
25 years later and I am a little bit more used to seeing “me” on TV:
• Aziz Ansari kills it with his stand-up. Having seen him live, I don’t think I have laughed more than I have when Aziz Ansari belts one joke after another.
• Hasan Minaj’s Homecoming on Netflix – I actually clapped at the end. In a room. By myself. With some tears in my eyes. He blended the Indian-American experience so well with comedy, drama, disappointment, etc. in the most touching way (He has TONS of other accolades, too, of course).
• Kumail Nanjiani’s Big Sick moved me so much – I remember balling in the theater. Have you seen this stand up from him about him being uncool in high school and his nemesis Waleed? He’s just plain funny.
• Mindy Kaling – Her writing, her movies, her style, her endeavors. She is just the coolest.
• Aparna Nancherla KILLS on stage. She is the wittiest comedian I’ve ever seen – so surprising and clever. And she sheds light on mental illness and what it is like living with anxiety.
• Hari Kondabolu isn’t scared of anything and really goes there. Race and social injustice are a huge part of his stand up and it isn’t his only schtick: He also talks about his love for mangoes. I still need to see his documentary.
• M.I.A. – A super creative Sri Lankan-British singer/rapper. She’s just the epitome of cool. She flipped the bird at the 2012 Superbowl half time show while performing with Madonna. WHOA.
• Kal Penn – the loveable stoner from the Harold and Kumar trilogy and an employee of the Obama administration. What’s not to love? (Side note: the H + K trilogy is the most important trilogy of all time IMO – Star Wars? LOR? Not really my priority, sorry, nerds!)
And now Lilly Singh. She has 15 million subscribers on her YouTube channel where it all began for her. And today she has a late-night talk show on NBC – A Little Late with Lilly Singh (a spot previously occupied by Carson Daly). Her first guest was [insert bells and whistles and confetti]…Mindy Kaling! I actually have not seen too much of Lilly’s You Tube channel, so I can’t say I am a super fan of her work just yet, but I am a fan of her and what she stands for: self-love, inclusivity, and being yourself.
Watching two Indian-origin women talking on stage on late-night television was a beautiful thing to behold. Lilly is bisexual. Mindy is unmarried and has a child (both are big “nuh-uhs” in traditional Indian society).
Being a hyphenated Indian person can be weird. The othernesss you possess is prevalent in the cultures you straddle. A lifetime of feeling like you are not enough or don’t fit in is serious baggage to drag around, which is why seeing oneself represented in areas that are not stereotypically Desi/Indian is essential.
If 11-year old me saw more Indian/Desi-Americans on TV I think life would have been easier to navigate. But it’s women like Margaret Cho who paved the way for the ones that currently are and those who will come after. Lilly Singh and others are continuing to do the important work of breaking down barriers for those who want to performers and artists but hesitate to do so because of lack of representation. I applaud these trailblazers – their perspectives are threads that round out the beautiful, colorful tapestry that is American culture.